y s a   l e a d e r s

Guidelines Regarding When To Refer To A Trusted Professional Counselor

If there are sufficient counseling resources in your community to provide professional help to your members in a timely manner, it is suggested that you refer if any of the twelve key indicators are present.

However, there are communities with a large concentration of afflicted members and there are insufficient counseling resources available. It is not recommended to have members waiting for months for an initial visit or waiting too long between visits. If you live in such an area, it is suggested that you follow this counsel:

Whenever a member is referred, you should ask the member permission to discuss his progress with the counselor and suggest that he sign a confidentiality waiver with the counselor allowing the counselor to discuss the member’s progress with you. This communication channel can be helpful as you assist the member through his repentance process.

Key Indicators:

1. Lengthy history of involvement
2. Worked with multiple bishops
3. Limited outside support—been in secret for years
4. In a dating or marriage relationship but still viewing
5. *Mental health issues: ADHD, depression, anxiety, OCD
• Suggested discovery questions:
• Has anyone in your family ever been diagnosed with ________?
• How about you?
• If yes, what is the impact on your life?
• Are you currently getting help or have you had help in the past?
6. Weeks of appointments with bishop, and member not making progress following his personal plan of action.
7. Social isolation
• Questions that will help you determine the extent of his social isolation:
• How much of your free time do you spend alone?
• Are you involved with extracurricular activities?
• Do you socialize and -Y´hang out¡ with your friends, family, etc?
• Does your pornography use keep you from being active in church activities and callings?
• Would you rather have cyber-relationships than ´real¡ live relationships?
8. Acting out sexually in ways beyond pornography
9. Influencing school and/or work
• Missing classes, failing classes, late for work, tired at work, threatened with job loss, using it on campus, taking more risks.
10. *Married and pornography is causing marital stress. Examples: A spouse making a partner uncomfortable with sexual expectations, emotional (chat room) or physical affair.
11. *Survived sexual abuse
• Suggested dialog – You have been through something amazingly difficult. How have you done it up to this point? Is it still influencing your life? Have you ever talked with a professional about this?
12. Same-gender pornography use